How to love, nurture and protect your inner child.
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Alan has never forgotten that Christmas morning, many years ago when he was an excited seven year old. The present he had been dreaming of was waiting for him under the tree. He could tell from the size of the parcel that it had to be the remote controlled plane, exactly the one he had been wishing for. Alan's excitement rose even higher, as he started to open the parcel.
And then disappointment! I
Instead of a ready to fly plane there was only a kit, just a box full of parts. It looked as though it would take ages for a seven-year old to put it all together.
But the thing that worried little Alan the most was the manual that explained how to build the plane. It was written in complex grown-up language that he could not understand. And, as he glanced through the pages, he saw printed in large letters a number of "WARNINGS" about things that could go wrong during the construction.
Meanwhile, Alan's father was full of enthusiasm as he imagined spending hours with little Alan, as a father and son team, putting all the parts together and creating a plane that would actually fly.
Do you have memories like this? I do. Can you recall as a child, how you felt (or imagine what you would have felt) when you discovered that what was inside the box was not "ready to fly" as you had imagined. And, not only was it going to take a lot of time and effort before you achieved success, but there could be lots of risks involved as well?
For many of us, as small children, the feelings were much the same, whether it was a model plane, learning to sew, play an instrument or mastering any other complex problem that required new skills. One reaction would be just to "shut down", to pretend we never really wanted that magical present in the first place. And that is understandable if it all seemed just too much for a small child to deal with.
The point of the story is that Inner child processes need to be kept straight forward and easy to follow. If they are full of psychological terms or complex procedures they have little chance of success.
This fable is the opening illustration for a much longer article Which comes first? Understanding your Inner Child or Helping your inner child understand you?
Little Alan's Christmas
|Stories and fables for Inner Children|
|AdverseChildhoodExperiences ACE survey|
|Your Inner Village and its Characters|
|Little Alan's Christmas|
|Muddled Magic and the Little Trauma Witch|
|Why tell stories rather than talk psychology?|
|Self Defeating RSDP|
|DTD Developmental Trauma Disorder|
|Is it Safe for me to Change|
|Personal or Impersonal|
|School of Life|
|Which Comes first|
|The Path and the Holes|
|More About John Nutting|